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The Blog The Weekly Musings of a Curious Mind

A Life Change, a Direction Change, a Shiny Website Change… perhaps

Things have been quiet

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You may have noticed a few tumbleweeds around here.

The truth is that I haven’t had anything appropriate to write.

Appropriate.

I really don’t know what appropriate is anymore. It started as one challenge, then became another challenge and another and another. Some of these challenges succeeded, some failed, and some took me around the world.

And now I have this dilemma because (more…)

Beyond the Grief – 4 Years On…

Ethan at Sunset

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This weekend is the 4 year anniversary of my little brothers death.

He died suddenly – aged 24. It was truly shocking and devastating.

At the time I found writing about it cathartic. But as the intensity of the initial grief subsided so did my willingness to share the deep chest pulling hole that you feel when you think about the person you love who should be here but isn’t.

Especially if you have returned to (more…)

Still Heartbreaking – 3 Years On

Ethan

Yesterday was a tough day for me, the 3rd anniversary of the death of my little brother Ethan.

I am fine, and fine and then a few times a year something triggers me and I am left crying into my soft boiled eggs.

On Monday a woman who is staying here, shared that her husband died 5 years ago. She was upbeat about the conversation as she translated Portuguese into Spanish (more…)

One year on

black

Today is the 1 year anniversary of the death of my beloved little brother Ethan. 365 days since it all came crashing down.

A few people have noted how well we seem to be dealing with the grief. No bitterness, no blame, no wanting to die like I might have imagined I would, if I ever were to imagine losing my brother and closest friend… well, before it actually happened that is.

It’s such a weird experience to have the people you love the most die; even the terms used to describe death are weird… “passed away” like a second hand shirt or “lost” like a kitten up a tree.

The thing is that however much you analyse the words or appreciate how amazing people have been around me or how other people lack understanding… it doesn’t change a thing… he is still dead. (more…)

2 steps forward, 1 step back… the ups and downs of this crazy old ride

I have a confession to make. Ever since the launch of the book I have really struggled to write blogs. Now that I have the illustrious title of “published author” I suddenly feel this immense pressure to actually give you something good!

This year has been a rollercoaster and luckily I have an easy going husband! He cheerily informed me yesterday that he can almost predict my cycle of outrageous excitement and meltdown (apparently 2-3 days up, 10 hours down) to the day.

Rather than trying to think of something profound, here is a couple of the (more…)

Coming full circle, a family tour of New Zealand

pippies e

I have been doing a book & family tour of NZ and time has slowed to a leisurely, wholesome pace – I seem to be having lots of adventures and yet there is still plenty of time to relax and get things done… I am sure there are more hours in the day here.

A lot has changed since I left ‘the land of the long white cloud’ 10 years ago, and I have a whole new appreciation for my friends, my ever expanding family and how beautiful the countryside is. (more…)